Facing reality

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Life is often unfair, or hard to comprehend. We wonder why bad things sometimes happen to good people, and good things to bad people. We hear things like: “He was a good person, why did he have to go?” Or “She’s so mean, yet she has such great luck”. Accidents, genetics, where and when we’re born, mother nature’s whims, government decisions, stock market antics - can be cruel or kind.

The world can sometimes seem unjust and wicked. People suffer in war zones, there is poverty, sickness, mental illness, alcoholism, drug dependence, discrimination, spousal and child abuse, racism, and evil, power-hungry people who cloak themselves in fake righteousness.

Thankfully, the world also offers miracles and lucky breaks. A car accident spares someone’s life, unlikely start-up companies become successful empires, a kid with ADHD becomes a nuclear physicist, an unexpected, amazing job offer is received, millions are born with healthy bodies and minds to loving parents in peaceful countries with an abundance of food, shelter and supplies available.

The challenge for us is how we cope with whatever we’re given. As the Serenity Prayer teaches, “… grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.” Life may be out of our control, but our reaction to it is not.

Life is usually unpredictable, a journey of relentless change. We are the ones who decide whether it’s good or bad, positive or negative, and whether it makes us happy or sad. We can choose to wallow in self-pity, or horror at what’s happening in the world, or stress about things we face every day. Or we can take control of how we think about things and create our own destiny. What we can control, we can try to fix. What we cannot, we don’t dwell on.

The first step is to accept that this is the reality. To understand that whatever the situation, life must go on. The state of the world that we are experiencing is either motivating or horrible to be witnessing. How we choose to face it can be what propels us forward. If we choose to be motivated by change, then this is the perfect time to help shape it and find new ways of inspiring our social circles, workplaces, families. Our light can shine from within, being the source of promise, hope, positivity and love, to help to bring solutions to challenges.

Later, when we look back, we will see the change that we’ve made. And the world will be a better place because of us.

If life were fair, there would be minimal news on TV or social media, since almost everything that happens leans toward bad or good.

Acceptance of now is a profound act that takes courage. It stops the pointless, exhausting debate of this is not how it’s supposed to be. It allows us to get on with living life.

Email me: bernadette@gogettercoaching.com .

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